[116] Screed City

[116]

03/16/2022 Wednesday. Kitchen Microwave. Beaver Haus. Lower Granville, Vermont.

All the logs are chopped. The juices are flowing like wildfire. All day long the steaming and boiling and burning and yummers yumming. I saw the first bikers of the season. Cyclists, I suppose. I also saw two women running. There is mud everywhere. My boots are soaked. The snow is nearly gone. I guess we made it. Spring is here. What is it? Five days to the equinox? 12/12. I guess it is time to get positive again? Hip-hip, fucking, hooray.

I mean, I did burn all the paper trash today. That is nice. Tomorrow I take Junior Mint to the doctor to get his pipes fixed. That will be nice. I have to get up pretty early so I can get a ride back from Middlebury by the Publisher. But Mike's opens at 8a, so it is probably best to get there first thing. I have zero idea what it is going to cost. My guess is $305.76. Which is a day of work for me. I mean, I can't drive the thing without the work getting done, so it is not like I have much of a choice here. I mean, if I sue Scott and the Publisher and the NY DOT, I may recoup my losses. I just need to get a lawyer to work for me pro-bono. I mean, I don't think anyone is pro-Bono these days, not since U2 and Apple did that forced record on the iPhones all those years ago. Remember that? Those dicks. I mean, I am just joking about suing people, I do think we all should have a vested interest in infrastructure because shit like what happened to me is going to happen to you too. Shit roads lead to blown out tires which lead to things being on the interstate that shouldn't be there that blow out your flex pipe and then cause you a $300 dollar bill from the mechanic. It is directly related. And Bono really can suck it. I have this picture of him in my mind, he is getting out of a private airplane that has landed somewhere in Africa. The great White male hope and his hot fiancé saving the world, one African at a time. I mean, I feel like those ads were about a watch or something also very stupid. Let me see if I can find it.

[insert photo of Bono being a jack-ass]

Okay, it is an ad for luggage. And it's not his fiancé it is his wife. But read this article. It is short and will make you have hate in your heart.

[insert Bono being a jack-ass article]

https://www.nydailynews.com/life-style/fashion/ad-nauseum-messages-bono-designer-wife-ali-hewson-louis-vuitton-fit-ad-article-1.207447

I mean, I liked early U2. I will leave it on the radio if it comes on. I mean, I was a little disillusioned when I learned that he became to front man for the band on looks alone and that he had to have a vocal coach to become the swooner that he is. But something happened along the way that just makes me somehow even more disillusioned. I mean, I may be a little biased. I spent about 15 years of my life trying to make it as a musician. Nothing but failure. Commercially. Artistically, I did pretty good. But I mean, "Beautiful Day?" U2 had two pretty good albums. The Joshua Tree and War. Achtung Baby was alright. But it was the beginning of the end. But what gets me is that at that point they were just so famous and had such a big following that no matter what they did it would be a commercial success and I don't thing that is deserved. I mean, I feel like Adele is in the same boat. I mean, I understand that it is pop music, but it is the same old shit. There is literally one billion bands out there in the world. With one billion million better songs and Apple chooses to force a U2 album onto your iPhone? The art world is rigged as a mother fucker. The whole system is corrupt! Merit is a lie.

Whatever. I am out of the music game now, so let them have their bullshit system for jerks. I tried to take it down from the inside, but I could only get so far. I mean, I am joking. I don't think I even stood a single chance, but still, there is good music out there that doesn't get any credit and it should. And who knows? TicTok has been doing some good things about this. Exposing the youth to decent music that nobody used to never have heard of. Bringing it to the kids. And TikTok will end at some point and some other thing will come along and do the same, so I am not that worried about it. Every day 1,000 kids in America start 1,000 bands in their parents garages. And most of them will suck. Some of them won't. Most will fail. Some will succeed. I mean, there is no shortage of artists in the world. I am not worried about that. In fact, I don't know what I am worried about at all. Nothing has changed. It is probably easier these days to get some sort of success being in a band than it was 10 years ago. Or even 20 years ago. It is just the nature of commercialization that bugs me. I don't know why. I have seen quite a few awful bands in my day. It was never about making money though. For me. I mean, it's like theater. You just hope that somebody will help you out. Maybe you do some touring. Then you can get a leg up or something. Make a career out of it. But you can never make a career out of it. You have to be incredibly lucky and be in the right place at the right time. And even then there are no promises. I mean, I was playing in bands in the 90's on the Lower East Side of Manhattan. If that isn't pure luck, I don't know what is. I mean, we just didn't have it. Whatever "It" is. And you can bootstrap yourself all you want, but if you don't have what people are looking for, then that is just how the cookie crumbles. As the bridesmaids say. I mean, at some point you start writing books and just go through all the shit all over again. And then, when that fails you keep doing it. Because writing books is a solo adventure. And that is something you can do until you drop dead. Nobody is going to give you shit about writing books when you are too old. You can't be too old to write books. Sometimes the best work comes out when you are older. I mean, that is true for music too, but if you are 60 and still hoping to write that one good song that will get the Geffen people over to your BandCamp site to sign you up for a million dollars, I mean, there is a difference between a hobby and a career. I mean, I am not saying that you shouldn't keep making music or writing songs. I am just talking about how much support you are going to receive from your friends and family. I mean.

I mean, I talked to G today about how their show went on Sunday. They said that it was low energy and that if the audience was considered small on Friday the show on Sunday was crickets. I mean, my words, not theirs. I mean, I said that I wanted to tell them this on Friday, but it just seemed mean. But since the show was over I could be honest. I said:

"Welcome to being in the arts. You will work for months and months on something. Give it everything you have. Tell everyone you know. Repeatedly. Get all of your hopes up, and then..." G finished the line.

"Nobody will show up."

I laughed. It is true. But then say you have a Broadway show and suddenly you are complaining about how there is this or that affecting your numbers. I mean, this is no offense to Professor Curly, but when the amount of people that come to just one of her shows is equal to the amount of people that even sees your shit over a decade, I mean, there is just no end to it. It doesn't matter. Champagne problems to me are devastating to you. I mean, it really is what it is. But the tragedy of nobody going to G's show is that everyone that has a kid on stage is legally obligated to go to the show. So if nobody shows up it is actually very devastating. I mean, I don't know how true it was that nobody showed up. I think they were talking about their school mates. And I know that there was three field trips planned on Sunday. One that was taking a bus to see the new Spiderman? movie. One that was going to the mall in Albany. And one that was going into New Lebanon to shop at the Dollar General? I mean, that is literally how fickle theater is. You get exactly the days you have to do a show and if it is raining or maybe the Super Bowl is happening or maybe Harry Styles is doing a album signing at Target, I mean, there is a possibility that no one will show up. Literally no one. And it very much hurts your feelings. But luckily theater folk don't have that many emotions so nobody notices. I mean, whatever. This is why I think that arts things should always be free. Even doing your band stuff at bars in the City. I mean, fuck those assholes for charging a cover. The bands never see it. They bring people to your establishment to just hang out and drink expensive drinks and then you charge the people for the privilege? The game is bullshit. When I become President I am going to outlaw cover charges for small venues. As well as abolish turnstiles. And also, even if nobody shows up, how does charging a cover charge help matters? The rent is too damn high!

Speaking of Harry Styles. I watched that Dunkirk movie the other day. PEEYOU! What a stinker. I always thought that the moment in "History" was overblown to begin with. A very English thing that happened. I mean, I have deep sympathy for anyone getting caught up in war and what it meant for the soldiers involved. But I mean, I still don't get it. It was an abject failure on the part of the English and French governments. One of those times when the success of Nazi Germany could have easily been avoided and "History" has turned it into this whole the West was somehow a moral victor because we had a pure heart all along bullshit. Like Churchill was some great leader and all you need to win wars is just being on the right side of history. I mean, nope. It was just bad politics and stupid planning that resulted in the deaths of thousands of children that the governments of the both of those countries were willing to just write off because that is what war is. You kill the children so the rich assholes in power can justify killing other countries children. I mean, nobody gave a shit about what Nazi Germany was doing because they actually agreed with most of the shit that Hitler was saying. It was only because he started to invade places that they didn't want him to invade that made them change their minds. I mean, watching the movie, it is a modern movie, that was made in like the last few years and it is still selling this narrative that nationalism is a good thing. That the armies were fighting the Nazi's because of some moral obligation. I mean, that war did not have anything to do with moral superiority. Hitler just went to far and it made people in power mad. I mean, do I know how they should have responded to Hitler in the beginning? I don't. He certainly told them everything that he was going to do and then he did it. Plus a whole hell of a lot more. I mean, Nazi Germany should have been stopped at all costs to begin with. But I mean, that quote from John F Kennedy's dad who was like the liaison to Nazi Germany at the time, the a main diplomat "I understand your problems with the Jews, we have that problem in America. We don't let them join our golf clubs." I mean, fuck you! And I think it is bizarre that these movies are still being made that put that lens on "History" the way that they do. I mean, they don't even call the enemy army Nazi's. They call them the "Enemy." Throughout the entire film. I mean, I guess the point is that the term Nazi wasn't used at that time, but still! At what point is that the one accurate thing you decide to convey? The whole movie is supposedly about how much the average English citizen sacrificed for their Country and how every one that lived in England at that time was a hero. I mean, it is pure bullshit. I give the movie zero stars. And not only that, but Harry Styles sucked. I mean, he has had this very positive image as some sort of feminist male hero because he posed on some cover of some magazine wearing a dress and even straight women think that is hot. I mean, give me a break. The guy is toxic male bullshit incarnate. He can't act. He is the last person you would want to have in a foxhole with you. He is a narcissist dick who only thinks about himself. I mean, supposedly he is a good actor because he keeps it real. But he is just a passing fad of straight White male-dom that slips just under the wire because he isn't farting and raping young girls. But it wouldn't surprise me to hear that he is just as much an asshole as he seems. I mean, the problem with making very straight and White and obviously privileged people the voice of queer or feminist culture is that it just doesn't ring true and the truth will eventually come out. I mean, he is the English version of Miley Cyrus. I mean, sure, it is nice to normalize queer culture, I encourage it profusely, but when it is based on a lie to begin with. When rich White pop musicians use this as a way to gain a bigger following, I mean, it is just cultural appropriation. If you ask me. And much like the fact that there are one billion artists out there in the world and we have no choice but to focus on these boobs, I mean, to me it just feels like the movement is stagnating and people should be ashamed of themselves. I mean, this, coming from a straight White guy. But still. Dunkirk is a bullshit movie. It is horribly written. Horribly directed. Even Mark Rylance sucks in it. He really hams it up. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if I learned that the English Cultural Council funded that stupid movie. I mean, I wouldn't be surprised if they were really pushing for Daniel Craig to play the Mark Rylance part. But he was too young.

Anyway. Nazi's=Bad. I mean, I have done extensive reading and learning about the Holocaust, I feel like I should mention that before I get accused of not giving that the proper respect it deserves. And like I just said, Nazi Germany should have been stopped at all costs before they invaded France and Poland. I mean, the Anschluss of Austria and the Rhineland and the idea of Lebensraum. I mean! We knew exactly what they were doing before they did it. And I know it is all very complicated that there is "History" involved. And what we know now versus what we knew then. I mean, we did not open our borders for the Jewish people during the Second World War. Even when we knew what was happening. I mean, I don't know what my point is, I am just saying that as much as we pretend that we have some sort of moral authority, we don't. And movies like Dunkirk just keep spreading that myth that we did at some point. There was no rag-tag group of English patriots that saved the English army from absolute destruction. Nope. It didn't happen. What happened was the people in charge panicked and instead of fighting to stop the Nazi invasion they stalled. Because why? I mean, that is up for debate, but I truly assume it was because they wanted to see what would happen. And then when the Nazi army kept going they were unprepared to retreat. And because they had no contingency plan all the soldiers got stuck on the beaches. Like sitting ducks. As the bridesmaids say. I mean, even the Nazi army was confused about how well their Blitzkrieg had worked. It wasn't supposed to work. The were not prepared for victory. I mean, they even stopped attacking. Because it was all too easy. Had they kept going they would have destroyed the English army. And frankly, they would have decimated the army to a point that I don't think the English would have recovered from. Which, I mean, that was the beginning of the end for the Nazi's. I mean, it took quite a few years and came out later with the Nazi invasion of Russia. But still. The idea that some old guy on a boat with his son and his sons friend, some loser that just wants to get his name in the local paper, that is what won the Second World War? It is insane! What is the point of this garbage? And how the hell does it make it into the annuls of our "History?" And this idea the "Hollywood" is somehow left-leaning?

I mean, Jayboo was crying about this shit a couple weeks ago. That "Hollywood" was anti-Conservative. If only they would make "Conservative" movies. Then we would get the truth out. I mean, watch anything! It is all "Conservative" bullshit. The idea that the One White Hope is going to save us from destruction. I mean, what was that Will Smith movie about the guy that just bootstraps himself and his kid from abject poverty to millions of dollars by lying his way into the Stock Market? I mean, I cried during the bathroom scene, but still, what a load of horse shit. Good Will Hunting. Shawshank Redemption. I mean, I watched Apocalypse Now! again. That movie holds up pretty good. The theme at least. I mean, when you actually think about it. But that is the problem. You actually have to think about this shit. Not just get blown away by the visuals and the Harry Styles of the world. I mean, whatever.

Saigon, shit.