[185] Screed City

[185]

08/19/2022 Friday. Milk Crate. Stabbin' Cabin. Worlando Beach, Wyoming.

Epic day, yo. I mean, if I would have posted the thing I wrote yesterday, I called it. I mean, maybe I will post that thing tomorrow. Last night was weird, and I won't go into details, but I was very distracted.

I mean, days like today, I need to figure out how to make a collection of them somehow. Or maybe I just need to write a book. About growing up in Wyoming with four brothers. That seems like the logical thing to do. I mean, it's funny. Like brothers going up to the mountain to talk about feelings kind of thing. I mean, in the back of my mind I am always thinking of noir stuff, or adventure stuff that goes wrong, but the reality is also interesting.

I mean, I set an alarm for 5a. I somehow woke up early though. And just kind of lay in bed waiting for the alarm to go off. I got up and started the coffee I had made last night. Brother Luke was asleep in the other living room on the carpet. He went to dart night at Nick's last night. Not sure when he got in, but he seemed fine when he woke up. PegLeg was already up. I mean, I cooked some bacon and some potatoes and scrambled some eggs. To make breakfast burritos for the road. I also got the lunch together. Four chicken burritos, four granola bars, two apples, some peanuts, some chips. I put then in the soft cooler I use to carry ice to the Stabbin' Cabin. I borrowed a back pack from PegLeg, her rain coat. I mean, I was basically ready to go. I took a shower, finished making the breakfast burritos, made a second pot of coffee. I mean, me and Brother Luke had finished the first one off. But we needed some for our thermoses. Before we knew it we were in the Jeep thing that he had borrowed from Mead. A thing that did not cost him $3,000 dollars.

We drove down to Brother Jade's. It was now 6:50a. His whole family was up. Some of the kids came outside to see what was happening. We were waiting for Brother Charley now. He was supposed to meet us at 7a. I mean, he showed up eventually. Which, I mean, he had the truck we were driving, the trailer we needed and the Mule we also needed. Plus he was coming from TenSleep. So, I am not saying he was late, he just happened to have shit to do. I mean, we loaded two of Jade's motorbikes onto the back of the trailer. Spent some time strapping them down. They were unruly and not only that, but there were shocks and stuff to contend with. I mean, we got it eventually and hit the skids.

We stopped on the way out of town to get gas. I went inside and bought four candy bars. Went back out to the truck. We drove across the street to fill the trailer tires, which were a little low. Then, again, we hit the skids.

The drive to Meeteetse is very stark. Beautiful even. The Gooseberry is quite the road. The creek the road is named after, not so much. A little trickle of a thing that I think ends at the Bighorn river. I guess. I don't know. That seems logical though. I mean, it runs through some pretty nasty badlands. So I am surprised it even has water. But it seems to. I guess. I mean, the drive is very dramatic, visually. On the right you have this long stretch of land that looks like it belongs in Arizona or Southern Utah or something. What? Mesa's or whatever? Bright colors, with dead land. A place you wouldn't want to be left without a canteen. Not a tree in sight. But if you fucked around long enough there you would probably find a dinosaur or two. Maybe even a buffalo skull. Possibly some petroglyphs. Stuff like that. I mean, spiritual land. But after you pass that hank of land the mountains start to appear in the distance. And by the time you get to Meeteetse, you are basically in the mountains.

We stopped at the gas station so Brother Jade could stretch his legs. He had a thing done recently that helped his veins. I mean, he needed to not sit for longer than an hour at a time. So we stopped. I went inside. Used the bathroom. Bought a red Gatorade for the hike. Or more specifically, the top of the hike, when we got to where we were going. Because by then, your water is almost out and there is still a bunch more hiking to get back down. I mean, I am getting ahead of myself here, but that is why I bought the thing. I mean, I walked back to the truck and we hit the skids for a third time.

We drove towards the mountains on the highway for another 20 miles. Then we came to a ranch. We drove over a cattle guard and into the ranch. There was a sign that said only certain kinds of people could use the road. I guess we were those kinds of people. I mean, I think the ranch is obligated by law to let people use the road. I mean, for good reason, it was the only way to get to where we were going. And the land we were going to was Government land. The People's land. I mean, it was dirt roads from here on out.

We drove slowly. Having a large truck with a trailer hooked to the back. There were tons of antelope hanging out. Strangely only female antelope with kids. Babies? I don't know what you call an antelope baby, a bubby? It doesn't matter. But there were no male antelopes for some reason. I mean, we rolled the windows down. Drove slowly. Came to gate after gate. I got out and opened them, then Brother Charley would drive through. Then I would close them. There is lots of grazing land here. With cows. I mean, we drove until the private land became public land. We went through one last gate. Brother Charley parked as I closed the gate. I walked over. Everyone got out. We unloaded the motorbikes and the Mule. I put the boots on that Brother Charley brought for me to use. I cursed my sock selection. I mean, they were these thin wool socks that I like for other things, but not for 10 mile hikes up the mountain. There was nothing I could do about aside from complaining. Brother Luke said he had a better pair in his pack, but I had already put the boots on. I would risk it. I mean, we loaded all of our bags into the back of the Mule. Brother Jade and Brother Luke got on the motorbikes. Which was comical. I mean, grown men on little bikes made for kids. I mean, one was a 100cc thing, and the other was a 125cc thing. Which, if you know anything about motorbikes, which I don't, but I do know this, that is very small for an adult man. I mean, I would think the smallest one you would want would be a 250cc thing. And even that may be pushing it. Butwhatever. They looked cool. Like narcos or something. Cruising around the hills of Columbia. Getting places faster than a truck could get you. I mean, we hit the skids for the fourth time this morning.

The drive for me and Brother Charley was nice. The Mule had a windshield. Little Obie dog was with us. He kept barking at the antelope. I mean, the road was rough, but not too bad with the Mule. At some point the other brothers became faster than us, so they went in front. Leaving gates open for me to shut as we drove through them. I mean, I could see where we were going. The distance seemed very long. But we were making progress. I mean, the mountains were coming at us quite quickly. And it was cool. And smelled nice. And the sun was up, but it didn't seem to want to burn us to a crisp. I mean, we have done this thing quite a few times at this point. Pops has been dead over 20 years now, right? I mean, I don't even know. He would be 75 now. What's 75 minus 57? 18. It's been 18 years. I mean, I am not saying we have come up here for 18 years in a row, I am just saying that we make this trip a lot. Professor Curly even made it with us once!

We finally came to the point in the road where a typical truck can't go any further. I mean, you cross a creek that gets hairier every year. Then you cross another creek that is a stack of a million round rocks. And then the road is just garbage. And it keeps getting garbager as you proceed. I mean, if you have four wheel drive and a lightweight truck, you may stand a chance, but as it is, it is best not to try. I mean, when we got to the point where we ditched the off-road things, there was a little truck nearby. With Montana plates. The tires were very muddy and it looked, to me, like they had given up driving, turned around and parked. Then just started walking.

We took our packs from the back of the Mule. Put them on. Started hiking. I made a note of the time. It was 10:30a. Which means that it took us 45 minutes to get to here from where we offloaded the off-road things. Which, I mean, we were running late, I guess, about 45 minutes later than I originally had estimated. This meant we wouldn't be to the spot until 1:45p or so. I mean, the walk at first is pretty easy. Just going through a little canyon thing. Next to a creek. And then it slowly starts to get more difficult. The trail gets steeper. You have a lot of frost heaves to deal with. Creek beds and the such. Ankle-bending stuff. And since it was later in the season, the grass was tall, so it was hard to see where you were stepping. I mean, I complained a little. Just for posterities sake ATBMS. But really, the hike was easier than last time for some reason. I mean, at first. I mean, even the next part, which is usually the place where I start to feel the altitude. I mean, I did just fine. I mean, the trial goes up and up at a gradual pace. Then it keeps going up. Then you take a turn and it really starts to go up. I mean, even this didn't bother me this time. I was starting to think I would do just fine. I mean, at this point though, the trail just goes straight up. And then there is no trail. It is just find a way to go and go there. Try not to break an ankle. Stay focused and don't rest too long. Because the more you rest the more your body wants to rest. Which, I mean, I remember this from swimming and mountain biking days. You don't allow your body to cool down too much, the inertia increases and it becomes quite difficult to get back to the same stamina you had just a few moments ago. I mean, I was lightheaded, but not too bad. My eyes were kind of funny, but the sun wasn't blaring, so my brain adjusted okay. I mean, I don't know if I was keeping up, or if my brother's were slowing down for me, but either way, we made progress. Stopping every now and again to glass the hillside. Meaning, looking through binoculars. Which I did not have. I mean, normally I find a pair, butwhatever, if there is a thing to see, someone usually will let me borrow their pair. I mean, it's not like I am going to spot an errant horn or something. Or an attacking grizzly. Or even a sheep. But, with my naked eyes I could see stuff. Plus I was too focused on staying alive at the moment.

I mean, up and up we went. Getting higher and higher. Stopping sometimes to rest or glass or to drink water. I took pictures. I mean, it was beautiful. And striking. And since I knew where we were going, I was able to keep focused. Even lead every now and again. If I felt like my stamina was inert.

And then, you get to the bottom of the top. You take a right. Suddenly you are climbing, like rock climbing up cliffs. I mean, not that dramatic. Nobody whipped out a lasso or something, but you are doing vertical stuff. And it is good. Because progress is more scary than hard. Because you look down and you don't want to roll down the mountain like a rag doll. So you make sure and stay focused and diligent. I mean, after a while you are on the top. And that is it. You sneak around the edge of the biggest cliff and drop down into this crazy drop-off. And somehow, every time, you get past the two very scary cliffs that will land you in a coffin. Or better yet, they will just let your body rot down there because who the hell is going to come get you? I mean, every time it makes my body feel things it normally doesn't feel. And it doesn't help that there are also very high mountains everywhere around you, so you have almost zero perspective. And all you can think is: "Well, if I was just standing on some random ground I wouldn't have these feelings, but for some reason, this element of danger amplifies my ability to trust my legs keeping me standing up." I mean, it is illogical, but real.

And then you are there. The cliffs above you. The mountains in the distance. The mountain you are on. I mean, I looked at the clock. It was now 1p. I mean, we were supposed to be here at noon. Somehow we lost 15 minutes in the hiking, but we were basically on time. I mean, I unloaded the lunch I had made for everyone. I took a burrito and a candy bar and a granola bar and some chips and sat down next to a pile of sheep shit. BigHorn sheep shit. I got back up and went back to my bag and grabbed the Gatorade. Then I sat down again. Started eating. Brother Charley was glassing over the edge. Brother Luke and Brother Jade did the same thing for a while. Then they just kind of milled around. Obie was exhausted, or so it seemed, she just hung out with Brother Charley. Who came down from the cliff and said he saw a bull elk just over the way. On the next hill over. Where his words. I mean, I was halfway done with lunch, but I got up to look. So did Brother Jade and Brother Luke. And sure enough. There was a bull elk on the next hill over. Easy to see with the naked eye, but unsatisfying. I borrowed Brother Jade's binocs and took a look. I mean, it wasn't much better, but I was glad to have tried. I mean, I went back and ate my lunch some more.

I mean, Brother Jade asked me about my Sherpa joke that I had promised to tell on the way up. I said it would take a while, so I would tell him when we got to the top. And, I mean, you know the one? About how airplanes leave fart smells at 30,000 feet that only Sherpas know about because they smell it at the top of Mount Everest? Yeah, that one. I mean, it was nice to actually try it out with talking words instead of writing words. But it went about as well as you would expect. I mean, not good. Not bad either, Jade is a kindred spirit, and we have the same sense of humor, so he seemed pleased with the joke, even if it sucked, but nobody was able to give me any suggestions on how to make it better. Mostly because the joke is just dumb, but also, I think I need a better intro. I mean, I was telling it like a scientist explaining how air travel works. And the dumb punchline needs to get a better understanding of the emotions of the Sherpa. I mean, it is a work in progress. I mean, we finished lunch. Took some pictures. The Brother's glassed some more. They found more elk. I retied my boots. My socks were doing alright. Not great, but alright. Brother Jade was also having sock problems, but in a different way. His socks were acting like quiters. Which is a term for a sock that slides down into your boot. The bane of bootwear. Because once it gets to a certain point you can't pull it back up again. So it just keeps sliding down. Cramming itself further into the toe of your boot and the only solution is to take your boot off, pull up the quitter and do it all all-over again. But Brother Jade was wearing very long socks. Because of his veins. I mean, to me, it seemed like he should instead be wearing tights. But maybe his socks were prescription socks?

We packed up. Gathered all the trash. Hit the skids for the fifth time today. I took a different route out because I wanted to see something. I was the first out, kind of, I went to high and had to come back down. Over the scariest part. Which sucked. But I did it. Brother Charley was now in front of me. I went up some cliffs and came out on top. I took a look around. Waited. Took some pictures. Eventually everyone came out around the side and we made our way down the mountain in a different route than before. A more direct and downward route. Straight down in fact. The idea was it was faster, plus you can run the gullys and sometimes find skulls and horns and stuff. I mean, going down is kind of harder than going up. Because it is so steep. Your knees get fucked. You have to slalom or whatever. Side to side type of thing. And you have to be aware of anyone above you. Because of random rocks or boulders that like to dislodge and brain you. I mean, we all took different gullys. The one I took had some bones. I mean, you gotta follow the bones. Otherwise you won't find the skull. I mean, the bones were nonsense. I mean, what happens is, in the Winter animals will die. Up on top of the mountain. They will get eaten or whatever. And then when the snow melts in the Spring, the carcasses will flow down the hill with the melting water. The skulls and stuff, the bones, will get lodged in rocks or whatever along the way. Basically the nature will just rip the Winter kill apart. Leaving a trail of death behind. I mean, it's August. Anything worth finding was found back in late May or June or whenever people come up here, but sometimes you get lucky. There is quite a bit of land up here. Nobody can get everything. I mean, so much so that when we got to the bottom. We congregated again. There was supposedly an antler dropped on the other side of the canyon. I mean, when we left the main place, it was 2:09p. I was keeping track of time just to know what exactly to expect, but this put a kink in the system. I mean, suddenly we were on the other side of the canyon looking for this horn. I mean, it was cool, I was glad we were doing it, but it was messing with the timing. I mean, I found a cool rock for Professor Curly, petrified wood even, and a cool crystal for G. But we never found that horn. I mean, we looked and looked, but we never found it. And suddenly it was getting late.

I mean, there were storm clouds on the horizon. And the air was getting cooler. I asked Brother Jade what another word for review was. He said: "Critique." I said: "You know what my critique of this hike is? I give it a blistering review!" I mean, because of my socks giving me blisters. I mean, we hauled ass getting out of there. Obie was in good spirits. Running fast to keep up with Brother Charley. I mean, like I said, going down, it's almost harder than going up. All the ankle-bending rocks and upheaves. But we moved like the wind. And finally we got to the off-road things. I mean, we loaded the packs into the back of the Mule. Brother Luke gave me a drink of his very cold and very tasty spring water that he stopped to get on the way down. We hit the skids for the sixth time? today. Things going down the same speed as going up. The Montana truck was gone. I mean, we saw those guys on the way up. But off in the distance. I mean, it was slow going. The road being garbage and all. Which is probably a good thing. Keep Wyoming Wild. The more people have to work for it, the better. In my opinion. I mean, we crossed the creeks. Got back onto the good part of the road. Then we hauled ass back to the truck. When we got there there was two other trucks there. With trailers. I mean, we didn't see anyone else, so they must have gone up a different route. I mean, it was now 5p. Which, I mean, there was four hours of hiking. Which means 12 miles. And a bunch of driving. I mean, either way the entire trip was going to be a 12 hour thing. Which is what I expected.

I mean, I should have given more details about the inner lives of my Brother's, but some things are private, and should be left private, but we all had a good time. And as we were driving down the road, just past the ranch, Brother Charley slammed on the brakes and backed the truck up. Everyone was like: "What's up?" He said: "Oh, I think I just saw a bear." And sure as shit, a grizzly bear was playing around in the creek. Like crazy. Like something out of a nature thing. Just kind of frolicking around in the water. And then it got up and started up the hill. We followed it as it went. It scared up some turkeys. Then it ran for a while. Then it stopped for a while. Charley honked the horn. It stood there looking over. I mean, it was great. Majestic even. We followed it for a while, then it disappeared. Then we drove back to Meeteetse and stopped for some water. So Brother Jade could stretch his veins. And then we drove back to Worland the same way we came. Talking about dentistry and growing up poor.

I mean, we finally got to town. We were supposed to meet the other family members at the Fair Grounds. Barbeque Bluegrass was happening. I mean, we got to the Fair Grounds and it was a madhouse. The place was packed. We followed a couple moms with their kids into the place where everything was happening. I mean, whatever, no offense or whatever, but my god. My worst nightmare. Every UpStanding member of Worland Society was there. And it suddenly felt like I was in high school again. I mean, I tried to get G and Cousin A to come get me, but G was at PegLeg's and Cousin A was at dinner. I mean, I was able to go around the back and hang out with Brother Jade's family at the face painting booth, and then we went over to some thing where this guy was pulling kids around on the back of his four wheeler like some train. And then I briefly considered walking back to PegLeg's. Thinking it would take maybe 40 minutes tops. But instead I went back inside. I mean, PegLeg gave me a ride home. I mean, I said my goodbye's first. But I couldn't take it. I mean, it was too intense. Butwhatever. Me and G are leaving at 9a tomorrow to go to see Guy and Rachel and Little I in Colorado. I mean, this is it for the Wyoming posts for certain. Smell you next Wednesday, I guess.

[Insert Hiking Photos Periodically, With Captions]