[186] Screed City

[186]

08/23/2022 Tuesday. Kitchen Microwave. Beaver Haus. Lower Granville, Vermont.

I did it, I guess. I made it home. I returned the rental. Which, I mean, they still haven't taken the money out of my account. Whatever that means. What a racket. The flight back was uneventful. When we flew into Albany there was a rainbow outside the window. I guess that is a good sign. G took a pretty good picture. I took a picture of G with the rainbow in the background.

[Insert G's Airplane Rainbow]

We got up super early to deal with the rental. For no reason it turns out. The drop-off was exactly that, a drop-off. We had to take a shuttle bus to the airport. Then the Frontier place was kind of annoying. They don't print tickets anymore. Which is all fine and all, except that I checked in with my computer, and it didn't go well. Professor Curly's ticket was separate from mine and G's. Which, I mean, we needed to use her ticket to transfer the checked bag, which, I mean, I will say, a funny thing happened. While we were dealing with the thing at the desk, which they warned you that any extra service would come with a charge. Meaning, if you needed help in any way they would charge you. But since I was technologically inept, I was holding up the line and the woman would have done anything in her powers to get me the hell out of there. And, I mean, it really did seem like her powers were limited, but she had steam coming out of her ears trying to figure out how G could have a boys name and look like a girl. In the end we ended up with a checked bag and two printed tickets. So that worked good for me. I mean, that is the trick these days, just hold the line up. Passive rebellion. They can suck it though. I mean, I love the bare-bones thing that Frontier is doing, still, you have to have a smart phone to travel or it costs more money? That is bullshit.

I mean, we were so early we had two hours to kill. Which was fine. Pleasant even. We got breakfast and just hung around. Boarded and then the plane took off. Simple. I mean, we got to Denver the day before around 4p. We left Aspen around exactly 10a. Drove over the pass. Which, my god. G took some photos, but it doesn't capture the glory. Above the tree-line. Hairpin turns. No shoulder. Straight drop-offs. It was hard to stay focused. But, stay focused, I did. After that it was god's country. Meaning the plains. Meaning, there were even herds of buffalo. G fell asleep at this point, so there are no photos. I mean, a few hours later we were in the Denver sub-burbs. We pulled over for a late lunch. Then spent an hour in traffic. Got to the hotel. Checked in. G stayed in the room while I took the rental to the car wash and to fill up the tank. With gas. The car wash was cool. One of those ones that have the blowers to dry the car and the long towel things that come down and swish side to side. Cost me $9 bucks. I pulled around the side of the building and used the "Free" vacuums. I mean, thinking the whole time about the asshole that started the rental car company. I mean, I imagined him making a bet with someone. Saying: "You know what? I bet I can get people to pay me thousands of dollars to rent the things. Make them so nervous about it that they will spend money to clean the thing. Charge them for cleaning the thing. And they will still be nervous about it." And then the person they are talking to said: "Haha! You think you can get them to vacuum it for you too?"

Or, whatever. I mean, there is a whole stand-up thing right there. I just don't have the energy right now. But I did it. The owner of the rental company felt some satisfaction deep in their empty soul about it. I am sure. A little tickle, probably. I drove back to the hotel. Stopping on the way to get gas. Parked the thing the best I could so that nobody would nick it coming into the parking lot. I mean, I was so close. So, very close. I went up to the room. G had just gotten out of the shower. They let me in. I asked if they wanted to get dinner in a few. They said not really. I said, okay, we will leave in an hour. I mean, G may be a teenager, but they are up for anything, really. The curiosity is strong. I mean, we hung out for a while then walked across the street to Ruby Tuesday. Which was chaos. Absolute chaos. The host sat us immediately. Not even asking how many people were in our group. Which was a bad sign. He sat us at a six-top. Which was an even worse sign. Then he went back. Came back with two more people. Sat them. Then did it again two more times until the waitress told him to stop. That: "I am already behind by four tables now. You have to wait to seat people." I mean, I was surprised she took it as well as she did. But she was a professional. She had some cool teeth ear-rings. She was Black, which, I mean, whether that detail is important or not, I am not sure, although most of the clientele was very old and very mid-West White. So I do think it factors in. She was pregnant and had a whale-tail. I mean, whoever she was, Ruby Tuesday didn't deserve her. But she was a great waitress. I mean, hold on, go back a second. One of the couples that got seated after us ordered the "Endless Salad Bar." They got up to get it while the waitress got their drinks. While they were gone the host sat another couple in their booth. So when the two middle-aged men came back their seats were taken. I mean, the looks on their faces. Trying to be gracious. But not really being able to hold it in. I mean, luckily the waitress happened to be standing there when they came back, otherwise there was going to be trouble. I mean, both me and G nearly died of embarrassment. I mean, G had to cover their eyes. Couldn't even look.

I mean, it was nice. The delay. For me and G. We got to hang out for a while. The usually 30 minute dinner it would have been turned into a two hour outing. I nursed a beer. G nursed a lemonade. They got the Caesar salad. I got some sort of fried chicken sandwich thing with tator-tots. Then I nursed a second beer. We ordered a Lava Cake. Which took 30 minutes to come. Then we ate it. The waitress comped it because it took so long. I said that wasn't necessary, but she said it was on her. Which meant that she got a 23% tip and the restaurant ate the dessert. Which, I mean, the waitress got the cost of the dessert added to her tip. Which means it didn't make a difference on the bill. Which is fine by me. Just desserts ATBMS.

The day before we hung out in Woody Creek with Guy and Rachel and Little I. We got up when the baby got up. Hung out. Ate blueberry pancakes and bacon. Drank coffee. Then we went swimming in Aspen. Guy taught G some swimming lessons. I did some learning too. Little I and Rachel floated around in the warmer pool. Me, G and Guy were in the lane pool that he had reserved for an hour a week beforehand. When the learning was done we went to the hot tub. Got real hot. It started raining. But all around us were mountains. And it felt like a chalet or something. The only thing that was missing were cocktails. After swimming we went and ate a very tasty barbeque lunch under some slopes. Guy got the cheeseburger. With collared greens. Rachel got the chopped brisket sandwich with mac & cheese. I got the exact same thing. G got the pulled pork sandwich. With collared greens. I drank and un-sweetened iced tea. Everyone else drank Arnold Palmers. Little I took a nap in the stroller.

After that we went back to Woody Creek. Hung out for a few. Rachel and Little I stayed behind while me and G and Guy went back into town to do a look-see. Guy showed us the town. Gave us a history lesson. Showed us where he worked. Showed us the hat store where the Bezos brothers bought their cowboy hats they were wearing before they took their penis rocket up into space. Which was funny. We went to the modern art museum. Which was free of charge. There were some cool videos. One of which G had seen before. Which was funny. I mean, right? What kind of 14 year old goes to an art museum in Aspen, Colorado and has already seen the exhibit before? An art kid from Brooklyn, is who. I mean, after that we walked by a bar where a guy got really excited when he saw me walking by. He said: "Man! I love your shirt!" I was wearing the "Hug Dealer" t-shirt that had a picture of a kitten on it. I looked at his shirt. It said: "Hug Dealer," but it didn't have a kitten. I mean, earlier I was lamenting on how the shirt was too ironic, like double ironic, so it didn't actually work, it was actually broken in the excessive use of irony and I was not going to wear it anymore. But after this interaction, I am not so sure anymore. I mean, his shirt was under-ironic and kind of creepy. I mean, he was drunk at a bar in the afternoon in Aspen, Colorado. Sitting alone. I mean, I always feel like a biker when I wear the shirt. But after this interaction, I mean, I still felt like a biker, but maybe being sober is what makes the shirt less ironic? I mean, I guess it depends. I mean, either way, we went back to Woody Creek. At a dinner of elk steak and steamed broccoli and air-fried potatoes. G didn't care for the elk. But they enjoyed everything else. I mean, after that we hung out, drinking Ticklers and stuff. At some point G went to bed. That was after Little I went to bed. The "Adults" stayed up until 11p. I mean, everyone was pooped. The night before we had stayed up until 1a somehow.

I mean, the day before me and G left PegLeg's at 9a as predicted. By me. By "Predicted" I mean, I insisted we leave by then. I set my alarm for 6a but didn't get out of bed until just barely 7a. I wasn't sore from the hike, but I was tired. I needed more sleep, but I didn't get it. Brother Luke was up when I got up. PegLeg too. We talked and stuff. Drank coffee. I can't remember if there was breakfast. But I woke G up at 8a. And we managed to get on the road at about 9a exactly. Having said goodbye and stuff. Smell ya later, kind of thing.

I mean, we drove South. Then we kept driving South. Then when we should have stopped driving we kept driving South. I mean, not really, we didn't need to stop, but we drove for over eight hours that day. Driving through some amazing and desolate parts of Wyoming. I mean, we even drove past the Penitentiary in Rawlins. And then to make a point of things, about the "Law And Order" nature of Republican Capitalism, the prison system or whatever, tax dollars being used to incarcerate people to keep the Social Order, I mean, America sucks, but we stopped in Rifle, Colorado. The home of the "The Constitution says nothing about separating Church and State," Loren Boebert. I mean, I drove us to Shooters Bar & Grill. With idea of taking photos. But the place was shut down. I mean, she used to own it. But because of, you guessed it, tax fraud, it was shut down. And there was no sign of the place. Not only that, but the place was just a bistro in the first place. It was not a road-house thing or even a restaurant out by the highway. It was a store front. At best. And, I mean, the bill of goods this movement is being sold. A fool and their money, right? ATBMS.

[Insert Tree-line Photo]

I mean, we ended up in Woody Creek around 6p. We ate some tacos that were very tasty. Then Rachel went out to see a friend for a birthday party. Me and G and Guy and Little I hung around. Little I went to bed. Me and Guy hung out. Talking about the good ol' days. Drinking Ticklers. G went to bed at some point. Bored of us. Naturally. Rachel came home. And somehow we stayed up until 1a. I mean, nobody was asking for it, but the night went on and on. And it was nice. We all thought we would regret it in the morning, but the Ticklers are special. I mean, we really didn't drink that much, but they are mostly water. So in the morning, aside from being sleep deprived, nobody was hungover like we thought we might be.

I mean, I guess that is it. Scott picked me up from the airport. G's mom picked them up. We made a plan to makes plans for the future. I gave G a big hug and said I'll smell ya soon, and that was the end of our trip together. I mean, if I was to think of it I would be sad, but for now I am just kind of jet-lagged and writing. Keeping all thoughts to myself. I mean, Scott picked me up in Junior Mint. We took the back roads home. Checking the scene. Suddenly everything was different in Vermont. I mean, Vermont is good. New York, not so much. Scott is going to borrow Junior Mint tomorrow to go to work at Skidmark. I mean, we stopped at the Compound. The Rockwood Freedom is back! Phillipa and the kids came up for the week. Grit is back from camp. I mean, I don't know. I need a day to decompress, so maybe it is good that Junior Mint is on the road. I mean, we'll see what tomorrow brings. My Dishwasher shirts came. They aren't exactly right, but there is nothing I can do about it now. Although, in the future, Rachel has a printing press. I will go through her now.

[Insert Dishwasher Shirt Photo]